This week, my girl crush Nicole (from over at Big Day for 10K) officially got engaged. I say officially because she and Mr. Man have been planning the wedding for months – just never got around to poppin’ the Big Q… obvs, a couple after my own heart. Anyhoo, several of us on Twitter (Are you following me? You should because I am awesome and I tend to swear a lot.) started chatting about how we got engaged and the emotions that we felt. I realized that I have never shared the details of The Boy and I’s engagement…mostly because it is THE MOST unromantic story even (and a wee bit TMI… but that really does make it funny). So, without further ado – here’s our engagement story.
You should know that we have been together for over five years and that I have spent the bulk of that time traveling back and forth from Alaska to San Antonio. I’ve also been working toward a degree in E-Commerce during a large portion of that time, too. Anyway, this last December, before I went home to Alaska for the holidays, we had a talk about if we should consider a future together (marriage and children) after I graduated the following February. Basically, I was thinking that if we should decide that it was best to go our separate ways – that would be the perfect time. Before I left, I pretty much told The Boy that if there wasn’t a future for us together then I was happy to be the one to make the move and, well, move on.
So, I went and then came back and we were happy being together. And then, on the afternoon of January 10th, something happened. We were fooling around and I thought that it was going to lead to its nature conclusion when, out of the blue, The Boy asked me, “Do you love me?” I thought that this was some new version of foreplay so I said, “Sure” – all nonchalantly. And kissing resumed. Then, The Boy asked me, “Do you want to have babies with me?” Again, I thought it was a weird little move of his and so I said, “Sure”.
Aaaand, more kissing. Next, he paused and asked me, “Do you want to marry me?”. Dude. This was some kind of seriously random pre-sheets action – so I said, “Sure”. So then he looked at me for a little while and then he asked me "I’m asking you if you would marry me and have babies with me".
And I realized that he was actually asking me to marry him. Like, for reals REALLY asking me. And I totally panicked. I did not feel an overwhelming outpouring of love for him. I just felt overwhelmed. I did not feel a leap of joy in my heart… I just felt a clench of, well, fear. I just had so many questions (Where would we live? Was he just asking me because he was scared of losing me? Or worried that he’d have to start doing his own laundry again?) – I needed answers.
So, we talked. I asked him questions and he told me answers. I expressed my concerns and he gave me honest opinions and told me how he was feeling (something that The Boy NEVER does). I cried a bit (again, not in joy) because I was just so thrown and I am such a planner that this was just too much for me to handle right then. So, instead of figuring all this out – we got dressed and went out to dinner.
And then we didn’t talk about it the rest of the day. The next day, he went to work and I wrote a huge paper for school (P.S. This was also my birthday). I really didn’t think about The Question for the first few hours that I was awake – too busy or trying to avoid it… I’ll let you decide. Then, I realized something – he never offered me a ring! So I texted him and asked, “So were you going to give me a ring or what?” Yep, just like that – no hello or anything. The Boy texted me back that he knew that I would want to pick out my own so he didn’t buy one. And with that – I knew. I knew that this was the man who knew me best in the entire world and that he would always try and think of me. I just knew.
So, I texted him back, “In that case, my answer is yes”. And we were engaged.
Romantic? Nope. RomCom cinematic? No way. Totally perfect for us? Absolutely. Later that day, at my birthday dinner, when all my family called to wish me happy birthday (calls that featured truly awful singing, by the way) – I was able to tell them the news. I’m telling y’all, it was pretty much the coolest thing ever – telling people that you’re getting married is SO MUCH BETTER than the actual getting engaged part. A week later, we bought my ring (you can read about that here and here) and I haven’t been able to stop looking at it since. It is so pretty and so sparkly that one time, I actually fell off an elliptical because I was looking at it while I worked out.
And that is our incredibly unromantic but totally perfect engagement story. How about y’all? Any other less than dreamy engagement stories? Did anyone feel overwhelmed or scared when The Big Q was asked? Please tell Tulle Nation about it in the comments!
***P.S. We're quoted in this article from the Philly Inquirer all about couples who are nixing their wedding bands post-nuptials. Check it out***