I got the cutest (and most honest) little bridal rant from a reader last week and I just HAD to share it with y'all. Liz Lewis is a bride planning her own wedding while also participating in the weddings of various guests. And she's got a few opinions on modern twists to wedding etiquette – take it away Liz:
Wedding planning brings up all sorts of etiquette questions. While wedding sites are helpful and cover quite a bit, there are many situations that Emily Post never anticipated. The following points of wedding etiquette are completely based on my own experiences. I’m sure that you'll have your own additions and opinions!
Image Courtesy of: Elm Hurst Inn
Feed people during food times. If you can't afford a full meal then schedule your ceremony and reception outside of normal meal times (late evening, for example) or consider asking family or friends if they can help by cooking something. Whatever you do, let guests know what to expect in the invitations or on your wedding website.
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Feed your bridal party well – especially if they're tied up all day with pictures, hair appointments, and/or manual labor. If nothing else, it’s an insurance policy against wardrobe malfunctions, goldfish shots, excessive sweating, and otherwise being that guy.
Image Courtesy of: Details Planning Company
Having no bar is better than a cash bar. If you want alcohol and can't afford a full open bar, limit it to just beer, wine or some signature drinks. Or, limit the time the bar is open. If you insist on having a cash bar then make sure that something non-alcoholic is covered. Guests don't come to weddings with cash in hand, ready to pay for soda or iced tea.
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Provide maps and a clear timeline for your bridal party so they know where to be and when. If you expect members of your bridal party to drive themselves around on your wedding day - make sure they know that in advance. While we're on transportation, renting anything with a built-in stripper pole guarantees someone will dance on it. Whether that’s a pro or a con is your call.
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Just because Target sells it doesn't mean it belongs on a registry. If you already own the basics, it’s understandable to register for some non-traditional gifts like camping gear or a piece of furniture that you plan to get with your completion discount. That said – buy your own 47" TV, laptop, Wii, PS3, and XBOX 360 Halo Edition (all of which I saw listed on one recent registry). If you really want that $1200 TV, register with a site that lets your guests make contributions towards a larger purchase so a number of people can pool their money (like Deposit-a-Gift).
Image Courtesy of: Merriment Design
Despite what my mom says, save-the-dates are not required. If you send them, make sure your list is set. Otherwise, it's going to be pretty obvious when someone's on the B-list.
Image Courtesy of: My Wedding Planning Tips
Think long and hard before you have the gentleman who catches the garter put it on the lady who catches the bouquet. I don't know how this tradition started, but I have never seen it end well. NEVER.
Planning a wedding really isn't much different than inviting people over to your house, etiquette-wise. Don't talk about the party to someone who may not be invited. If you invite someone over at meal time, feed them. When they ask what they can bring to the party, don’t ask them to bring beef tenderloin when you’re only providing pretzels.
And, please, don't make them pay for drinks.
Thanks, Liz. So Tulle Nation, do you agree with Liz and her opinions on modern wedding etiquette? Do you have something that you'd like to add? Did you also laugh so hard that you snorted when you read the advice about nixing the stripper pole in the limo (No? Just me?)? Fire away in the comments!