Answering More of Your Baby Questions, Concerns, and Comments

Remember when I answered a bunch of your questions, concerns, and comments regarding my pregnancy/baby? Well, I've gotten more – so I'm back and doing it again!

Oh, pregnancy hair. You’re one of those awesome things that supposed to happen when a woman gets knocked up. Everyone says, “Oh, your hair is going to be SO thick and SO shiny and SO amazing.”. Well, it is… sort of. But seriously pregnancy, WTF is up with all this damn hair?!?!


Yes, I KNOW. I'm very, very fat. Thank you SO much for pointing it out. It TOTALLY slipped past me. How would I have ever known if you hadn't told me?

So, are you miserable yet?

Well hello, Negative Nelly. What a strange and very rude comment to make to me right off the bat. Most people lead with “Hello” or “How are your feeling?” but you? Oh no, you go right for the negative.

P.S. I'm feeling fine… but I'd recommend that you look at yourself a little closer and see if YOU are feeling fine these days.

Do you have a name yet? So what is it?

Yes, we do have a name (we finally settled on both her first and middle names last week); however, we're keeping it secret until she's born.

No really, what's her name? You can tell me.

No really. We're not telling you. We're not even telling our families. We really are keeping her name secret until she's born. It's just something special we decided to do. And I'll hear no crap from you about it thankyouverymuch.

Can I see her room?

Sure! It's the old guest room and it's currently filled to the brim with boxes of hardwood flooring (almost 1,200 square feet to be exact), stuff from other rooms that have to move in order to lay all that new hardwood flooring in the rest of the house, and a full-sized bed, desk, 2 chairs, storage rack, and cabinet. We have done absolutely NOTHING to the room to prepare it for Baby Voldemort. As soon as more of the hardwoods are laid down, we're hoping to get it drywalled and maybe even painted. But until then, no room for baby – she'll be taking up residence in a corner of our bedroom… you know, once we get off our asses and buy her a crib.

Are you ready for her to be born?

No. It's not that I'm afraid of birthing her (I'm not) it's that we have SO MUCH TO DO before she gets here. Finish laying the floors, finish the kitchen (at least, get the appliances in and the cabinets in), finish her room… and on and on. Listen, this little lady can stay put all the way to my due date and then some. I'm totally cool with that.

I heard you want to leave the hospital hours after you have her… are you crazy?

Not crazy. Just accustomed to a different “normal” than other people. In my family, we have home births with midwives and get right up and moving after having the baby. To me, it's NOT normal to lay in a hospital bed for days afterwards. My normal is my bed, with my cat and my husband, and my TV, and my own meals in my own kitchen. So yes, I will be trying to leave and go home after about 6-8 hours in the hospital (our insurance will not allow us to use a birthing center or do a home birth). If there is a medical reason that I (or the baby) actually NEEDS to stay in the hospital, then we will. But if not? I'm going home. I'd rather sleep in my own bed and eat from my own fridge.

Are you in pain or uncomfortable?

Not really. I mean, my feet and hands are really swollen and that's uncomfortable but I don't have any lower back pain. And, other than a few times, she's not so big that she's getting stuck in my ribs or in a painful spot. I am waking up in the night to roll from one side to the other more often but I fall right back asleep. All and all, I'm pretty lucky.

Who do you want her to look like?

Vanessa Williams. Fingers crossed, y'all.

My birthday is in July. Can you make sure she's born on my birthday?

Ha! No.

Is The Boy going to be with you when she's born? Is he catching the baby? Cutting the cord? Washing her?

Honestly, he's nervous about it and says that he'd prefer to be in the waiting room but… his ass will be right by my side the whole time. However, as of right now – he doesn't want to catch her or cut the cord. He has no experience with births and I think he's a little overwhelmed. I'm totally cool with it as long as he's helping me through the labor part. Right now, my best friend will also be there and she's tapped as the one to catch and cut (with The Boy allowed to change his mind at any time and do it instead). I just want him to do what feels comfortable for him. Birthing can be a scary thing for partners so NOT pushing them past their comfort zone is very important.

As for washing her, we're planning on holding off on that as long as possible and letting her skin reabsorb as much as it can. When we do bathe her, The Boy gets dibs (if he passes then it will be Nana or best friend's job).

Are you planning on working after she's born?

Yes. I will be taking all of July (and maybe some of August) off from Kiss My Tulle (I'll have pre-prepped and guest posts during that time). And because the blog doesn't make enough for me to go full-time, I'll also be continuing to take in freelance web and graphic design jobs AND looking for a “real” job. The goal though is to ultimately become a Work From Home Mom (like my mom was) and The Boy and I will always be working toward making that goal happen.

Can I come see you after Baby Voldemort is born?

Here's the thing – the answer is yes and no. I definitely understand that people want to drop by and see her, me, and The Boy and share our joy. Totally get it. But please, DO NOT come to the hospital without an invitation (and honestly, we're only inviting grandparents and maybe our siblings). I'll be exhausted and beat up and just want to sleep or hold my baby. Breastfeeding will be new and I'll be trying to figure that out while also bonding with Baby Voldemort. I promise, I'll post tons of photos on Instagram, Facebook, and Twitter and text you all the details!

Once we get home, I'd love to have a few people drop by and visit. PLEASE! Call first and arrange a time. Please DO NOT drop by unannounced – we might be napping or just not in the mood for company. Also, please keep your visit short (like, a half hour max). We'll still be trying to bond as a new family plus figure out the ropes… not to mention trying to sleep! We love you and know you love us so you'll understand if we're just not up for entertaining the masses for hours.

Sorry to sound like an ass but… really, call first and be understanding of our limited abilities when it comes to being good hosts AND good parents. We promise – once we figure this whole thing out, we'll TOTALLY be up for longer visits (both at home and away). But until then, bear with us and respect our wishes. Thanks for your understanding!

I didn't get my gift to you in time for your baby shower! Is it still okay to sent it?


Please, we love that you were sweet enough to want to give a gift to Baby Voldemort and we don't care when it arrives (two weeks from now, two years, or when she graduates high school – really, we don't care!). Seriously, she's not going anywhere. Send it along when you can and we'll love it. I promise.

Bottle or breastfeeding?

I'm planning on breastfeeding but also pumping so that The Boy can bond with her at least once a day through bottle feeding (after the ever important first two weeks). But if I can't or she can't, I'm not embarrassed to bottlefeed exclusively. You can only do what you can do.

You hate just sitting and holding babies – how will you survive breastfeeding?

Sweet Jesus, I have no clue! I'm hoping that between the apps on my phone, the countless TV shows I've DVR'ed, and pure love for her that I'll be able to make it. Plus, my mom will be here for a few weeks to help me get through those first awful weeks of breastfeeding.


Let me know if you have anymore questions, concerns, or comments regarding my pregnancy or baby plans! I'll try to answer them in the comments.