// This was originally posted in April 2013 //
I’ve been promising to talk about my miserable first trimester and it’s time.
Basically, my first trimester was MISERABLE.
Awful.
Terrible.
So bad that I actually considered never having another baby because there was NO WAY that I could be pregnant and care for another person.
Just bad, bad, bad all around.
BOOM Goes The Nausea
I was fine until the sixth week – then, right on track with all the baby books, I woke up nauseous.
And the nausea lasted 24/7 for the next 10 weeks solid.
Morning, noon, and night – I was nauseous.
I never threw up.
I was just always right at the point before throwing up (but could never actually vomit so I never got any relief).
Super Fatigued
Also, in traditional pregnant-lady fashion, I was also super fatigued.
Between the nausea and fatigue, I was worthless.
I couldn’t do anything but sit on the couch and eat carbs or greasy fast food (eating carbs/fast food was the only time I got any relief).
And for a few very bad weeks (eight through 10), I literally lay on the couch and did yoga breathing from the time I got up until the time I went to bed.
It was that bad.
I Felt Completely Useless
I felt so guilty during this time because I was completely useless.
I couldn’t:
- cook (the food smelled and required me standing up for too long)
- do any housework (I remember the day that I was able to do one load of laundry – greatest day ever)
- bathe regularly (The Boy must of laughed that one)
Forget working out or eating right.
Between the carbs, French fries, and couch living I gained SO MUCH WEIGHT.
Like all the weight that I spend two years losing for my wedding – it’s all back.
It Was Rough
The Boy tried so hard to help me but what could he do?
He bought me whatever food I wanted and ignored how messy our house was.
At one point, I was so miserable and guilt-filled that I started crying and apologizing for everything.
He totally won Husband of the Year points for snuggling me and saying, “Don’t worry about that stuff. You’re busy. You’re making a person.”
Thanksgiving Almost Wasn't
I still felt bad around Thanksgiving but still insisted hosting it at our house (this was still when we weren’t telling our family about the baby).
Thanksgiving is MY holiday and no baby is stopping me from cooking that dinner.
I did pretty well considering but the smell of the turkey and then the Brussel sprouts nearly did me in.
Actually, that’s my husband’s favorite story to tell now from my first trimester (it’s funny… now).
I also managed to stay awake for the entire thing – though I did pass out on the couch before the last guest had even left the driveway.
Why Don't You Just Feel Better?
And yes, I tried everything to feel better.
I switched up supplements, snacked on crackers, and smelled ginger – everything short of prescription medications (which I try not to take ever, even when I’m not pregnant).
Nothin’.
Nothing worked – just resting and eating bad food.
I truly hope that next time is better but at least I feel a bit better because I know what to expect.
Did any of you have a miserable first trimester?
Katie says
Literally feeling this right now. I work from home and it’s a daily struggle to even function. I wonder how all those pregnant moms do it because i feel so weak and so worthless in this stage. I am literally counting down the days till my 2nd trimester.
Cris says
Girl, you’re not worthless – you’re literally growing a whole ass human being. Give yourself grace and some tacos.
Marissa says
Thank you, thank you, thank you for sharing this. This was scary relatable because it was literally like I was reading my own life story. Everything you went through I am currently going through EXACTLY the same way. Good to know I’m not going crazy! And I too am counting the days til my 2nd trimester in the hopes I won’t be one of those moms that suffers through this the whole pregnancy. Also, if you don’t mind sharing, what did you end up having? Boy or Girl? I’m curious about my own intuition and wondering if it might be correct 🙂
Cris says
For this pregnancy, I had a girl: https://www.kissmytulle.com/meet-melanie-jocelyn/
Hang in there, I had a miserable first pregnancy and an AWESOME second one. You are not alone. Not every pregnancy is freaking magical.
Marcia says
Thank you for this post. I am in first trimester and so miserably nauseas. Also feel like I cant do a darn thing. Just sit around and be miserable LOL. I also am trying everything. Preggi drops, ginger tea, ginger ale, citrus, crackers, toast etc. but alas, just so wont let up. Wondering how I will get through this, plus pandemic means that we wont be having a steady stream of friends and family visiting… Its’ so hard to wait the 12 weeks to tell friends and family, this is when I need them the most. We told immediate family etc.
Anyway, thank you for the post it makes me feel better knowing that other ladies have very similar experiences. There is not that much literature out there on this that I have found… it all makes it sound like morning sickness is just temporary etc. Anywho, I hope all the mamas in there first trimester feel better soon!
Cris says
I feel you hard. When I was going through this, everyone acted like it was just throwing up and no one could understand that I literally couldn’t throw up (and feel a bit of relief after) – I was just knock-you-down nauseous all. the. time. Hang in there, mama.
Mounika Arkala says
Thank you for the post!! I am in my 1st trimester and literally feeling so miserable right now, I never felt like this from my past entire life. I am just hoping for the better days.
Cris says
Same. It was just so awful. The good news is that I definitely felt better after 20 weeks – hopefully, you do, too!
Warah says
Thank you for this post! I’m on my 8 week. I felt so miserable and stressed. I’ve been doing nothing. All I do is throwing up the food I ate. In and out of hospital. I hate myself . 🙁
Cris says
Do not hate yourself. LOTS (and I do mean LOTS) of other women feel exactly the same way as you. Pregnancy is not magical for many of us. All I did for nearly 20 weeks was crawl from the bedroom to the couch and back. Every. Single. Day. Do not feel guilty – you’re making a freaking human. I’m here for you.
Aubrie says
Currently struggling hard. Don’t know if it’s something I ate, but not bleeding so things must be okay… Always nauseous all day long before eating after eating. If I don’t have a headache all day, I have strange pelvic pain, or my belly feels like it’s going to explode. My first child was a piece of cake, now I’m angry at myself for thinking this was a good idea. The family wanted another one. I’m so useless I feel like I’m letting my family down not being so active and fun. I’m miserable. Trying to make the best of it but it’s very hard. Reading this form helped me feel better, that it’s not un normal to feel awful. 8 weeks 4 days….
Shivani says
Thanks so much for sharing this, Cris! I am absolutely miserable and depressed. I feel like I have no one to talk to about this. The handful of pregnant women I do know never complained about feeling the way I do. I’d love to chat and ask you more questions!
Cris says
Email me any time (cris@kissmytulle.com) or DM me on Twitter – https://twitter.com/kissmytulle
Katie Davidson says
8 weeks pregnant here, and so freaking miserable. The nausea is constant. Even prescription meds aren’t helping. I just want to sleep because that’s the only time when I’m not miserable. But sleep is hard to come by when you feel as if you could vomit at any moment.
Cris says
Hang in there, mama. I feel you completely and 100% understand what you are going through.
Marie says
I am 9w 4d and I’ve literally been in bed sleeping. Just when I thought moving slowly would decrease motion sickness and dizziness, migraines have made the levels of laziness that much stronger. People constantly tell me to enjoy this time, as my fiancé has been a huge help around our home. I just feel so bad because this is something we are so excited for-yet I want things to level out so I can feel normal again. That’s where the guilt comes in. I just remind myself everyday that these feelings won’t last forever and they’re hormone-related. Thank you so much for your post!
Cris says
It’s totally normal to look forward to something completely, yet hate it at the same it. It’s also normal to feel guilty about that but keep reminding yourself that you’re making a human and your body is trying to figure out what to and what the hell is going on.
Marie says
Much needed post. Literally feeling like vomiting on the couch (nothing ever happens) with a pillow in between my legs whilst deep breathing and typing in “miserable first trimester” to make sure I’m not alone. Couch. Bed. That’s it. Hope it passes soon. Thanks for the post.
Cris says
The feeling like throwing up and not being able to is THE WORST. I hated it so much and was actually relieved during my second pregnancy when I *could* actually throw up.
Payton says
I am barely getting to week 7 and this entire post is exactly how I feel. I googled “first trimester miserable” and this story came up. I am so glad I clicked the link. Especially how you said that only eating horrible food makes you feel better! I’ve been trying to tell the few close people that know that I am constantly nauseous but am also constantly eating. I am so tired and I am so miserable, I hate feeling this way 24/7. I usually work 40-46 hours a week (from home) but I barely worked 32 this week and I still feel drained. Anyway, this was encouraging to know I’m not being over dramatic about all of this. Thank you!
Cris says
You are not being overly dramatic AT ALL. It completely sucks and I’m with you in solidarity.
Katie says
OMG. Thank you for saying it plainly. I am 13w3d today, and every single day since 5w5d has been absolutely brutal. I’m still working full time, but I’m often in bed by 7:00 because I can’t handle it anymore and I just want to sleep through this whole thing. I’ve been on anti-nausea medication for about a month and it barely does anything. Just when I think I’m starting to feel better it comes rushing back harder. I feel so depressed and useless. It makes me feel hopeless- I can’t enjoy anything. Nobody ever talks about how common it is to feel this TERRIBLE during pregnancy. I’m really hoping it improves in a week or two once I hit 2nd trimester. I don’t know how I’ll survive otherwise. Thanks for writing this.
Cris says
It’s like reading my own story again. I FEEL YOU. Just take every day, minute by minute (cause that’s how it feels, right?) and hopefully, you get that sweet, sweet relief in your second trimester.
Christy says
Ugh I can’t thank you enough for this! 9w5d and I’m ALWAYS nauseous yet can never actually throw up, I feel so miserable. I’ve tried every hack and suggestion under the sun but zero relief. It makes me feel a little relief to know I’m not alone. I feel so guilty wishing for this to be over even though we tried for years and was finally successful with IVF. Everyone makes me feel that by “complaining”, I’m ungrateful, ugh now I’m hormonal rambling…lol thanks all you wonderful ladies for making me feel normal <3
Cris says
Christy,
My best friend also struggled with the guilt of conceiving after years of IVF and then hating parts of pregnancy. IT IS ALLOWED. Not every part is magical or wonderful. And that is okay.
Rachel says
Currently 11 weeks into my 2nd pregnancy and I’m so thankful for this post. I, like many of the other commenters, have found it difficult to find people to relate to. I woke up nauseous at 4.5 weeks and have been in misery 24/7 ever since. Parked in bed or on the couch, attempting to have enough energy to work, and eating terribly. Unfortunately I also have mom guilt on top of that with my 2.5 year old son, but my husband deserves an award for literally taking care of everything the last 7 weeks. My first pregnancy was a walk in the park compared to this one. Hoping for relief soon, but this was a breath of fresh air to read — I literally relate to every single thing you said. Thank you!
Cris says
Thank you for sharing your story, too. I remember feeling so alone and like a freak when I was struggling and it’s still nice to that I’m not alone (even 7 years later).
Lisa says
I feel like I could have written this!!! I’m 13 weeks pregnant and an end to the 24/7 nausea is nowhere in sight. This is my second and while I was sick for my first, it’s 100x worse this time. I’m miserable each and every day. I finally caved and got a prescription for Zofran. It’s a miracle worker but now I have to deal with the hemorrhoids from the constipation. Can’t win!!! I’m hoping to turn a corner as I get into the 2nd trimester, but I’m not holding my breath 😂
Cris says
Do you have a Squatty Potty? Might help with the hemorrhoids? I sincerely, from the bottom of my heart, hope everything gets better for you. Because I KNOW IT SUCKS.